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The only reason I am even discussing this subject tonight is because, even though I've tried over the years to forget about these situations, I was thrust into the center of such a situation very recently and thought it was an important clue for young and inexperienced managers to know when making important hiring decisions.
At the least it would give the young managers the pieces of the puzzle that would normally go unanswered until they had many years of experience and learned it the hard way. Ladies, you're probably not going to like this but it IS the truth.
Here we go. When hiring a man for a position of leadership and he has to talk it over with his wife you are DONE! TOAST! During my forty years in sales/management I have never seen one example of a man being successful in a leadership role that has let his employer know that he has to discuss the position with his significant other. A man has to be in charge of his own destiny while caring 100% for his wife and family. He cannot tell his employer his WIFE wants to know about the pay scale. He cannot bring in his wife's schedule and say HIS schedule has to conform to his wife's. There has to be a certain amount of MANHOOD in Management!
I fully understand sharing the information about your new position with your wife...but you CANNOT tell your employer that your wife does or does not like certain things about your new position. You and your wife can beat it around all night but at the end of the day the Man has to present it as HIS own thoughts. I have actually seen it get so bad that one man actually brought his wife in to tell HIS staff what to do! Usually this type of person is a very nice person but quite frankly they are spineless. That is the reason they turn the decisions over to their wives. They do not make good sales persons and they make HORRIBLE managers.
Here is the sad part of the story, by giving in and letting themselves to be led by the nose they do not see the conclusion of the movie. The very thing they are trying to hold on to the most, usually the woman, is the very thing they eventually lose. Most importantly, when they lose their woman they realize they have also lost the most productive years of their life. The reason I felt compelled to share this thought with you is that I have watched several young managers hire these type people and then they are completely miffed when it doesn't work out.
Truthfully, without the experience or someone giving them the scoop these young managers can't figure out what happened. Remember, as I mentioned these people are very nice and often appear to be the perfect employee. Just for general knowledge there seems to be NO similarities when the roles are reversed.
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